About Her

As my fingers nimbly dance on the claviature, the encephalon orchestrating every delicate move, distributing subtle signals back and forth, you still manage to intercept and squeeze your way in my stream of thoughts. I smile. I know I'm in yours too.

I can't wait for our gaze to meet and time will halt to honour the immaculate feeling that blooms within us at that very moment. With puzzled look on our faces, we make our way closer. Without uttering a single word, we understand. Our eyes are doing all the tête-à-tête. Everything else from that brief encounter would start to fall into place perfectly.

We will make our lives full because we have filled the void that has always been in us before our fate intertwined. We make each other happy just by existing. We make each other smile just by breathing. The only tears that will ever come out from us would be because we laughed too hard. You with your silly jokes that would never get old and my goofiness that leaves you in stitches. We can even laugh at each other. Arguments and fights that we purposely create because we love to test ourselves but you can never keep a straight face and we end up laughing all over again.

There would never be a dull day because you and I just can't stop talking about everything. Always up for something new. Unpredictable as life itself, one day you decide to talk with a Scottish accent, next day we'll be learning how to salsa. Just because we can. You never cease to amaze and surprise because you and I, we grasp the concept of we can do whatever because it's our life.

Still life is life, there would be rough patches and bumps along the way. But we pick ourselves up as fast as we tripped. Hand in hand. You never let anything affect you. For that, from your strength, I find mine.

I tell you I'll climb all the way to the heavens to let God know what a good job He did for creating you. I tell you I'll give you everything of your heart's desire. I tell you I'll pick the brightest star for you to keep. I tell you I'll blow away the clouds that's blocking the sun from shining on you. I tell you I'll protect you from any harm. I tell you I'll-

You'd tell me to shut up.

Because you would tell me that I'm enough. I'm already everything for you. Just like how you are to me. You tell me love should be effortless. That by being yours, is already more than anything that you can ever want or need.

My fingers slows their pace. I'm glad that I thought of you tonight. That's the only place you'll ever be because...

You don't exist.

I'm done.

Afan.

Vida

You run. Convulsing and heaving. Inhale, exhale. Still running. You're not moving even an infinitesimal away from what's chivying. It's vexatious, enervating and debilitating. You try. You will never thrive. Unless you perish. That's the only available method. Only by the Almighty's volition though. Not yours. For that will lead you to another imminent run but an eternity as the limit. Sounds like an easy choice to surmise if ever asked. From experience, it's not.

You hide. You build a fortress. A solitude where you ensconce yourself from everything in hoping nothing can infiltrate or percolate. No luck. It finds a way to permeate any crack once found. Everything then crumbles. Back to square one. What now?

You fight. Gather all your might. Clench your fist. You strike. No avail. It doesn't even flinch. Another strike. It's now laughing. Everything's failing. What now? As stated prior, you can try to run again. Ask yourself, can my legs hold itself? How durable are my lungs? Will my heart beat itself out of my chest?

Am I strong enough?

You're not. Nobody is.

What is that you're running from? What is it that you're trying to hide from? What is it that you're trying to fight?

It's futile. Because it's Life.

Stop. Turn around. Embrace it. The more you run or hide or fight it, the uglier it gets. If you accept it, it will always take you to a place where whenever the sun lays its rays on your face, it's halcyon. The breeze as gentle as a newborn's touch. Even after Life takes you to a chaotic commotion of precipitation. Withal, you can even direct Life to where you want to and it will reach when it's time. All you have to do- all you can do is hold on to it. Have faith and keep the corners of your lips curved upwards.

I'm done.

Afan.